Sometimes I catch myself blaming someone for how I feel. Then I realize, maybe there is enough space for me and that other person to both be having a hard time. I think, “maybe it doesn’t have to be all or nothing,” or “you versus me.”
I’ve been experimenting with the idea that life is so much more than binary. So so much more. And so, if everything is on a spectrum, doesn’t that mean that there is enough space for everyone to be themselves, exactly as they are?
What if me and someone else are both suffering at the same time? I am not taking up space that prevents them from suffering. Our mutual suffering doesn’t negate or cancel the other’s experience. So, isn’t there enough space for both experiences to exist and be valid?
My identity and my experience of life doesn’t take away from the experiences of those who are physically and mentally healthy. My experience and the rawness that I share about it may make some people uncomfortable but it can never take away the space and right for them to live their life or for me to process mine.
This realization makes me feel a lot more compassion for the experiences others go through. There isn’t a scarcity of space for the human experience, so why do we act like there is? Why do we think only some ways of being a human are acceptable, when we can’t cancel or negate the space that exists for everyone. But we can and have created and promulgated so many systems of oppression that remove space and validity from certain groups of people and make it so their very existence is criminal, threatening, and wrong. But it’s not.
The main things wrong are how our society is structured on scarcity of space, blaminh, fearing and shaming others, and the incessant need to prevent discomfort instead of leaning in to connect with others who have different experiences to learn, share and grow together. Today, I am feeling like we can lift the veil and see more clearly how much space there is for the whole gorgeous expanse and variety of the human existence.
In our increasingly hate filled and divisive world, please know that there is space for all of us. In our hearts, we know this. The world is big enough for us all, if only we can put down our need to shame, blame, separate and “other” people. It is time to stand in our hearts, breathe deeply and create a world where there is space for everyone, but no space for bigotry, racism, discrimination, ableism, transphobia, homophobia, hatred, misinformation and war.
In my heart, there is space for everyone. Will you join me in holding space for this beautiful world, where there is space for everyone and no one feels threatened by people living their lives authentically? I hope so 🥰. Thanks for reading my thoughts.
Big hugs, Bradlee
©️ Bradlee Zrudlo 2025. All Rights Reserved.
PhD in Being Me 