I’ve been sick the past few days and it has helped put things in perspective. Even when I am sick or struggling with the symptoms of chronic fatigue syndrome and anxiety, I am always blooming. Even when I feel like I am taking several steps back, I am always blooming.
It’s so easy to get down on myself, to forget the wonderful person I am, the good I do for myself and others each day, and the multitude of healthy choices I make. It’s easy to focus on what isn’t going well, when there is so much beauty and goodness in my life, much of which I have chosen, cultivated and nourished. I wonder….does a flower ever say, “damn it, I should have bloomed fully by now. I’m not sure why I’m lagging behind?” Or do it just revel in joy that it is always blooming and growing, even through the stages that may appear to be less beautiful? I wonder….
Wherever you are at in your life, may you know how glorious you are through every struggle, every heartache, every moment of despair. May you know that you are constantly blooming, even if the soil of your heart’s garden doesn’t seem very fertile, or if the sun doesn’t seem to be shining on you.
Every moment you live, may you be inspired to make the healthiest and wisest choices possible and may you connect with the true beauty you are. May you see yourself as always blooming, even when everything around you is changing with the seasons of life. I see you and I honor you. I am cheering you on and smiling at you.
I am sensitive, easily stressed and anxious. I am also growing and learning and finding new ways to care for the wonderfully sensitive person I am.
As I reflect back on my life, I see how many times I didn’t know I had options. I would just be anxious and sit in that for a long time. I often related to myself and life from a very disempowered and victim-like place. In the last months, I have been growing more empowered as I learn more options for responding to life. Am I an expert yet? No! Does it feel awesome when I first remember that I have choices and then actually explore them? Yes!
I am very fortunate to have had an opportunity to talk with a therapist from the Kemptville Stress Relief Centre. She gave me some excellent advice that seemed to have opened up a dormant part of my being. I was asking about how to set my kid up for success in life and she empowered me so I could empower my kid. It was really awesome. More specifically, she encouraged me to do some research about my areas of concern, talk to my kid about them, work together to find solutions and agree to check in with each other regularly. It seemed so simple and so much more effective than just worrying without any action.
Since that time, I have been noticing that I feel more confident and empowered, and less anxious as a result. It’s amazing to remind myself of how capable I am and that I don’t have to feel like a victim when I give myself space and time to consider options, consult experts, talk about my feelings, talk to my family or friends, etc. I understand that it will take time to let this sink in and for this new way of being to be my default. In the meantime, I pledge to recognize my anxiety and explore my options so I can become more empowered.
Does this resonate with you? Have you also felt anxious and stuck like a victim? What have you done to move forward with respect and care for yourself? I am excited to be at this place in my life, better late than never, eh?
Thanks for reading! And big hugs to you! I love and honor you as you become an expert in being your lovely self!
I have been writing poetry for several years now. Writing has helped and guided me through periods of massive personal growth. It has also helped me learn to connect with myself and learn to become an expert in taking care of myself.
I kept my writing in a drawer for quite awhile. When I slowly and shyly started sharing it with others, I started understanding how powerful my words were. And how they contained so much healing and acceptance.
I am so grateful to be able to transform my life experiences into poetry; lately I have been feeling the depth of my poetry’s alchemy. I feel its power to help heal, guide and validate others and I am humbled and grateful. And so, I am sharing the exciting news that I have published my first book of poems about grief, loss and transition. I am donating the proceeds to the Beth Donovan Hospice to thank them for all they did for me after my mom passed unexpectedly in February 2019. It is my hope that it brings peace, comfort and healing to all those who need it 💕. I invite you to learn more here:
I offer this new poem in honor of you and all the pain, heartache, grief and loss it has included. It is dedicated to my beautiful friend Carla ❤️. She has inspired me to know that no matter how agonizingly slow my personal growth and ability to self-love have seemed, it is okay. Some things take time.
Some things take time
“We don’t judge a fetus in utero for how long it takes until it is ready to be born. We don’t rush a flower to hurry up and bloom while the petals are still forming. We don’t expect a toddler to write a PhD thesis or to be able to drive a car.
So why do we rush ourselves through our healing? Why do we judge ourselves for being exactly where we are at?
Some things take time. The exact amount of time until they are ready, not because they are slow, doing anything wrong or broken. But just because that’s the amount of time they need.
If you are frustrated, angry or overwhelmed by the length, depth and breadth of your healing journey, I am with you. I have felt like this for the last 10 years. What I woke up this morning with is this, ‘Some things take time.’ I feel like there is so much truth in that.
Maybe if we can be with ourselves and sit in our discomfort and pain, we wouldn’t judge ourselves for being exactly where we are at. Maybe if our culture didn’t value doing over being, we would all expect a long period of healing in our lives and we would know that some things take time. Whatever the reasons, what matters is this: You are valid no matter what is going on in your life. You matter even if you have been in a tough spot for what feels like 100 years too long. You are a precious treasure even if you feel as worthless as the gum under a school desk or as gross as poop stuck to a shoe. You are special even if you have been crying, yelling, grieving, hating or fearing for longer than you ever wanted to. With each breath you take today and every day, may all cycles of abuse within your life and those around you be completely healed and resolved. With every judgement, may you love yourself more than ever before. With every moment you choose to be instead of do, may our societal expectations of value from doing be completely healed and transformed.
Some things take time. You are worthy of all the time you need. Breathe in and know, you matter. Take your time dear one, take your time.”
Thanks for reading. I love and honor you exactly as you are. Some things take time, even publishing poetry books, writing blogs, or having the strength to become an expert in yourself. I super get it and I am with you!
I live in Kemptville, Ontario, Canada and right now, it is fall. Fall is such a gorgeous season. It’s a time when our trees explode into gorgeous bright colors, almost like a celebration before the depth of slumber during winter. I love fall. It’s a time of transition, of nature celebrating her glory and beauty and the air is so crisp and fresh. I feel like the wind carries different messages in the fall; messages of reassurance, strength and empowerment to help us through winter.
Winter can be such a time of quiet, reflection, self-care and cocooning and fall is the turning point. We’re at the point in fall now where there is still so much beauty, colour and bird song that fills our ears, eyes and hearts. For whatever reason, even as the leaves fall off the trees, I don’t usually feel sad. I feel full of hope, possibility and power. Because of this, I look to nature for inspiration to confirm and deepen these feelings.
Beautiful Maggie leading the way through the forest
I live on a precious piece of land that has 12 acres of forest. The other day, as I was crunching through leaves on the paths in the woods, I thought about how full the forest is at this time. Despite the fact that the leaves will all fall off, the forest feels like it wants to showcase it’s beauty and splendor. I find that fascinating. Even though a temporary death will be occurring, there is such celebration in the air. I have been stopping to look up at all the leaves, with their bright colors of red, gold, yellow, orange and green, and I’ve been drinking in their celebration. I can feel it nourishing me deep in my soul.
A beautiful cluster of trees showcasing their colorful transformation
I’ve been looking for other signs of inspiration too, not just from the trees and their gorgeous canopies above me, but on the ground. This fall season, I have been more fascinated by the mushrooms in the forest. Mushrooms burst up from the decay on the forest floor. They are born from what is decomposing, they have short lives, and some of them are poisonous or deadly. I saw these mushrooms the other day, and they reminded me of me.
There they are, emerging from under a bed of pine needs, just like I am emerging from so much transformation, healing and pain. Those mushrooms gave me so much strength – they were born from decomposition. I am being rebirthed in this phase of my life, what is no longer serving me is decomposing and is fueling the me who is emerging. How glorious. I can draw inspiration from the trees who are celebrating what is leaving, and do the same. I am like the trees and the mushrooms.
I had the privilege to meet with an Indigenous Elder many years ago at a lodge. I had been getting messages from seagulls and learning more about our connection to the Earth and I asked for some guidance about how to move forward with my new connections. He taught me about how the Creator has given us everything we need and that there are messages for us everywhere. I love being rested and open enough to hear the whispers in the wind and to be able to receive them and their gifts in my heart.
In a future post, I’ll share about the various messages I have received from birds. In the meantime, may you feel and be so loved each and every day, no matter what type of transformation you may be going through. May you also be blessed to receive the messages that our beautiful Earth Mother shares with us through all of her gorgeous and precious creations.
Over the last few years, I have been feeling a growing desire within me to uplift humanity, to make people smile, and to help them feel seen and heard. As a part of this, I was inspired to transform my car into a Lovemobile. I feel good knowing that wherever I drive my car, I am anchoring blessings of compassion, love, acceptance and acknowledgement for people!
Getting into my car makes me feel so good, so I figure I’m on the right path. I love it when people give me air hugs or thumbs up and I send extra blessings of love to those who turn away from it.
May seeing these images inspire you to learn more about who you are, what your needs are and what you can do to become the most highly educated expert on being you!
PhD in Being Me 