Sometimes I feel the emotional pressure building up inside me, and I feel this urge to flee the pressure and the feelings. Sometimes I distract myself. But sometimes, I am brave and I turn toward it, instead of trying to get rid of it.
I have this pressure on the left side of my jaw that comes and goes. I learned recently that I can sit with that pressure and tell it, “I am here. I want to understand you, not force you or make you go away. I am here.” Apparently, when we lean in towards discomfort, it signals to our brain that the uncomfortable sensation is safe and not a threat.
That makes a lot of sense to me. I had done a lot of energy healing work in the early 2010s. It was incredibly helpful for me in many ways, but it was quite damaging in others. It ended up teaching me to try to get rid of any feeling in my body that wasn’t “of the light,” so I got scared of the heavy feelings and was always in a rush to do some healing process to get rid of it. I understand how energy healing (at least the way I was taught) really amplified the lack of safety I already had in my mind and body and made me more anxious. It also made me feel like I couldn’t be me, as I was, that I needed to keep striving for better and more healing.
Ah, hindsight, eh? The good news is I understand myself more now, and I have a greater sense of my needs and what works for me. So, the idea of turning towards physical and emotional discomfort with care, presence and allowing is very refreshing and exciting for me.
As a way of preparing myself better for future discomfort and being open and allowing, I am drafting some language I can draw on:
- I am here for you and with you. You are welcome here.
- I am with you and it’s a joy to be with you.
- I love you and I am here. Thank you for being here, and thank you for teaching me how to be with you.
- You are allowed to be here and I would love to get to know you.
- I am here, is there anything you’d like me to know?
The important thing for me is not to try to say these things when I need them, but to actually feel curious, caring and compassionate and then offer those words above with those sentiments. Otherwise, I will just be covertly trying to fix or manage myself instead of giving myself a gift of care, allowing and compassion. I am going to experiment with this and see if I can truly feel into allowing in my body instead of just trying to do it with my thoughts.
I look forward to sharing an update in the future.
May you be well, and if you’re up for sharing, I’d love to hear what works for you ❤️❤️, Bradlee
©️ Bradlee Zrudlo 2026. All Rights Reserved.
PhD in Being Me 