PhD in Being Me

Tag: blogging

  • A chance to do things differently

    Bradlee holding up a white paper with art using paint colors and a fern from her woods.
    Me and my new style of art with ferns, Ferns in Northern Lights, with a loving message at the bottom.

    I have been stressed lately.  More like STRESSED lately.  A few upsetting things happened all at once, and they all had elements of uncertainty.  Because I have chronic fatigue syndrome and a form of PTSD, any bit of stress really exhausts me and throws my tiny sliver of balance right off. 

    The more I’ve learned about trauma, the more I can feel, notice and see the impacts that stress has on my physical health.  I have also learned that some of the ways that I’ve been coping with stress and difficult situations have had a negative impact on my health.

    I realized yesterday that I could use this latest batch of life events as a way to practice using my new tools and awareness from therapy and the Primal Trust program I am following. 

    When I was talking to my therapist last week, she was so compassionate and helped me understand just how much I was dealing with.  That made it safer for me to get to know some of my feelings, instead of keeping them locked away and compartmentalized for another time.  I hadn’t even realized I was doing that.  What started out as an amazing protective strategy that has helped me through many challenges is now going to keep me sick and make me sicker because it’s keeping the stress alarm ringing in my body.

    My therapist asked me several questions to ask my belly, where I was experiencing the most discomfort.  That gave me a chance to tune in, listen and give myself the gift of my own presence.  It was really nurturing and it freed up the emotions to flow.  I was really scared and I got to actually feel it, as opposed to being disassociated with my feelings.  It was very healing. 

    That was a week ago.  The last few days, I noticed that I was ahead of myself.  I could literally feel my energy in front of my body instead of in it.  I wasn’t sure what to do about it, but I recognized it was another protective strategy keeping me out of my body so I didn’t have to feel everything that was so scary and upsetting.  I knew I needed to try something different, so I sketched out what I was doing.  It was helpful to see a visual of it. 

    Cartoon like sketches of Bradlee processing or avoiding her emotions.
    My sketches of what I was feeling inside as I explored how to handle the new challenges and the emotions they brought up

    After I sketched these, I had a good cry and I talked to my husband about how I needed to experiment to find healthier ways to take care of myself through this latest challenge.  That was helpful too.

    This morning, I started at page 1 of my Primal Trust 40 day “Daily Regulate” program, and it helped me so much.  Sometimes starting back at the beginning gives me a chance to see the same material from a new place and from a different perspective. 

    The first day is about the chronic stress response and how to address the nervous system instead of focusing on symptoms.  It teaches about closing the eyes, putting a hand on the heart and asking questions like, “what am I feeling inside my body right now?” and “what am I thinking about that.” 

    I started my morning with this practice and I started crying right away after reading the first question.  It was such a relief to read that question and to know that it was an important step in identifying my needs and feelings.  It gave me a chance to tune in and be present with myself. 

    I think it was such a powerful practice because I was out of my body or my feelings were out of reach and the first question brought my awareness right into my body.  It feels good to use this latest challenge as a chance to do things differently, to treat myself with more care, compassion and kindness and to ask for greater help and support as I go through this time. 

    Inhale.  Ahhhh, exhale.  Yes, I can do this.  It will still be hard, but it will be easier as I take care of myself in new ways instead of just reacting from old stress patterns. 

    There is so much potential growth and healing in challenges, like creating new art that helps me process my emotions. The fern below is called Anxiety.  It was painted with colors that I associate with nausea and being twisted up in knots inside.  And it’s spiky because I used a rough brush and I love how rough the parts are outside of the fern.  And the hollowness of the fern echoes that emptiness that can come inside from feeling overwhelmed by life.

    an orange, brown, yellow and green outline of a fern.

    And so, there it is.  A chance for me to do things differently.  To take care of myself.  To connect with my body.  To externalize my feelings through my words, art and asking for help.  To know that I am worthy of taking care of myself and that it’s okay to feel scared and physically uncomfortable.  I can be there for myself. Each day will be different, but even small efforts will make an impact.

    I wish you so well and may you connect with what helps you through life’s challenges.  Big hugs and thanks for reading, 💕💕 Bradlee

  • Echoes from the past – Learning to make my present voice stronger

    An underwater body of water with a cave at the far end

    The echoes from my past are here, calling to me, echoing. 

    Keep yourself small.

    Don’t do anything that can get you hurt.

    Change your behavior at the smallest signs of irritation from the person you are with.

    Keep your anger down, it’s not safe to show it.

    On and on they echo, reverberating within me, reminding me of what I have survived and trying to protect me from that in the here and now.

    Those echoes have served an important role in my life.  Without them, I may not have made choices that have kept me safe.  But with them, I have also been living in the past, and making decisions from that past that may not be necessary in my life today.

    I’ve been learning more about the living legacy of trauma and how the story or narrative of a person’s trauma is alive in their nervous system and body.  The nervous system remembers traumatic events and works to protect from similar events in the present. 

    My therapist has gently guided me to this understanding over the last 2 years and it’s taken that long for me to even feel safe enough to recognize the teachings and not feel triggered by them.  She has helped me understand that my current circumstances are very different and safe and that my “trauma narrative” will always try to keep me safe, even when I’m already safe and cozy.

    And so, this morning, I heard these angry, irritable thoughts in my mind, and I thought of them as echoes.  Those thoughts were trying to protect me from my past, which really didn’t match with what I knew to be true this morning. 

    They were calling to me, echoing, and I recognized that my true self’s voice, the one I have been cultivating, nurturing and caring for, is getting stronger.  And that strength helped me stay separate from those echoes and rest in what I know to be true within me today.  It was a very simple, but powerful moment of liberation.

    Those echoes helped me realize how far I have come, and that even though they may always be echoing, maybe they’ll get quieter and the voice of my present self will continue to get louder, more confident, secure and grounded in my present.

    I love learning about trauma.  It’s been a scary and intense journey to face and acknowledge the pain I have experienced and lived through.  It’s also been liberating to learn how the nervous system works, what an incredible job it’s done for me and how I can work with it to create a greater sense of safety in my present.

    Thank you echoes, thank you to my past, thank you to all the incredible people who have and continue, to love, support, care for and uplift me.  You’ve all played a role in me having this realization this morning.  Thank you for being a part of my life.

    With lots of gratitude and appreciation for where I have been and where I am going and for you for witnessing my journey 🩷🩷🩷, Bradlee

    ©️ Bradlee Zrudlo 2026.  All Rights Reserved.

  • I am what I’m searching for

    Me and the dogs taking a rest break

    Last week, I was trying a new somatic practice, and it was helping me.  I became aware of myself thinking, “maybe this is it!  Maybe this is the thing that will finally help me get better.”

    I have thought that thousands of times over the past several years of figuring out how to live with chronic fatigue syndrome.  To be honest with myself, I haven’t just been trying to live with it, I’ve been trying to get over it, over and over again.

    That awareness the other day helped me realize that deep inside me I am still caught in the trap of trying to get over myself and hurry up and get better.  I’ve made lots of progress in being kinder and more compassionate to myself instead of always taking a deficit and fix myself mindset, but I guess there is always room for improvement!

    I started reflecting on all I’ve done for myself over the years and I settled into a new knowing:  I am what I’ve been looking for.  It’s my dedication to myself, my willingness to grow and explore my inner world, to ask for support and to follow my intuition about what is working and what isn’t and what speed to journey at. 

    Maybe it doesn’t matter that I’ve been unwell for so many years.  Maybe it just matters that through it all, I’ve been here, willing to keep experimenting to show myself that I am worth it.  That I am allowed to be exactly as I am and that I can also keep learning to help myself in new ways that will cumulatively surround and fill me with care, love, compassion and healing, regardless of any outcomes.  It’s me.  It’s not the tools.  It’s me.  I am the one.  I am it. 

    Hmmmm, that feels good.  I value and treasure myself and my life and I am living in ways that show myself that.  So if the latest practice helps me feel a bit better and less exhausted, awesome.  If it doesn’t, or I need something else, I will adjust and pay attention to my needs.  Yes, that is nice.  I like it.  No blame, no shame, no hurrying, just settling in to being me, exactly as I am, in this moment and tuning in to see what I need.

    I wish you all the best in attuning to your needs too!  May you see and acknowledge the good you do for yourself and may you be inspired about what unmet needs you may have and how you can go about meeting them (that’s my plan for today 🥰🥰).

    Big hugs, Bradlee  🌟🩷

    ©️ Bradlee Zrudlo 2026.  All Rights Reserved.

  • To the many me’s who came before – a letter

    An art therapy piece with a painting of a young Bradlee with colors all around her and supportive words

    Hey Bradlees!

    You are so very special and important to me.  I am sitting outside as the sun is setting and I thought of writing you all a letter to let you know how awesome you are and have always been.

    You were such a sweet, innocent and excited child.  Sensitive, easily overwhelmed and confused by the ways of the world, but no less precious for it.  From the beginning you were someone who could sense the undercurrent in life and you wanted to help others who felt it like you did. I’m still like that now, I hope you’d be proud of the person I’ve become.

    You really loved being at school – you were good at it and you had such wonderful friends.  All the schools you went to helped you feel like you belonged and you mattered, thank goodness for that.  I remember how in elementary school you would get everyone to sing songs on school trips.  I remember your first kiss with Mark and how the whole school was talking about it.  You were tough when you needed to be, but very soft, caring and sensitive, and confused about how to make things work with friends, with young romances and how to get things right so you could feel safe.

    I remember the heartbreaks of a boy, Chris, choosing Sonia over you.  I remember going to a different high school than my good friends and thinking that meant they didn’t like me any more.  Oh, how young life was confusing, but the truth is, it still is.  I’m 46 and the difference is that I have more experience now, but life is still complex.

    Gosh, so much time has passed.  You’ve had so many incredible opportunities and friendships and some very deeply traumatic times.  Please know that thanks to you, and everything you’ve learned, overcome and experienced, I am the person I am today.  I treaure and appreciate you.  Thank you for everything you went through.  Thanks for all the hard lessons you learned.  Thank you for leading with your values even before you knew that you were. 

    I think of all the me’s who came before and I am grateful for you all.  The one who was exhausted but signed up for a work opportunity anyway, which ended up leading to a 24 year career (with parental and disability breaks) in another city. The me who was so fed up with dating loser guys and signed up for match.com, and found the love of her life.  Well done, you!   The one who trusted her intuition time and time again while parenting, despite all the pressures and advice from many different corners.  The one who knew it was time to apply for disability leave even though she was scared, my goodness, thank you.  

    To the me who recognized how shy she was and decided to perform at an open mic night at a comedy club just to prove to herself that she didn’t need to be shy.  And you killed it!  That was awesome!  To the me who wrote a poetry book about grief to raise money and awareness in her community and loved it so much that she co-created a second book with members of her grief community as a caring resource.  All while being exhausted, but it filled me up in ways that were so so welcomed and needed.  Nicely done!!  

    You have so much to be proud of.  I know things have been hard and it’s easy to focus on that, and this letter is my way of celebrating all the greatness and goodness that has been there through the hard times.  You are so incredible at uplifting others and helping them feel seen, I hope this letter makes you feel the same.  You are very worthy of being seen.  Your words matter.  Your life matters.  You matter, and I love and appreciate you.

    Thank you for getting me to here, I’m so excited for what’s next.  I raise a glass to all the me’s who came before and ask you all to join me in moving forward together, more healed, whole and integrated than ever before.  Here’s to us!

    Xoxoxo, love lots, Bradlee 🌈🩷🌟

    ©️ Bradlee Zrudlo 2026.  All Rights Reserved.

  • For days when my symptoms kick my ass

    Tired me

    Well, sometimes my symptoms kick my ass.  And today is one of those days.  To be honest, the last few weeks have felt like this, I am just getting better at letting myself feel shitty instead of trying to overcome and fix everything I experience all the time.  

    I am practicing being with myself when my body is so uncomfortable or when I have racing, catastrophic thoughts, or both.  It’s not super pleasant, but I am enjoying the new strength and resilience I feel at developing these skills.  It sure beats trying to run away from or distract myself 🩷.

    Lately, I’ve been writing about allowing myself to feel what’s going on within me and allowing the symptoms to be there.  Today, I am getting great practice because I am so uncomfortable. All I can really do is acknowledge that this is my reality and be kind to myself.

    I am using some of my tools to see which ones will help me hold space for this discomfort, but not hold it so tight that it can’t move through me and shift if that is what it is going to do.  I am writing this as a way to acknowledge my experience and to soothe myself because writing almost always helps.  But my eyes and head hurt and my cognitive capacity is pretty low, so I am going to keep it short ❤️.

    I have been unwell for quite a while now, but through trauma informed therapy and nervous system rehabilitation, I am learning how to be here, in my body, with myself, while I am unwell.  I am very grateful for that!  I am feeling worse lately, and I almost wonder if that is in part because through allowing myself to be exactly as I am, then I am less in denial about the state of my health.  And that allows me to better sense just how much chronic fatigue syndrome and healing from trauma are a huge part of my life (for now 🤞🏼💝).

    One moment of witnessing my symptoms, one moment of speaking kindly to myself as I weep, and one moment of making a gentle, caring choice at a time.

    May you be blessed with lots of care, a wonderful support system and lots of whatever you need today.

    Big hugs, Bradlee 💖💖💖

    ©️ Bradlee Zrudlo 2026.  All Rights Reserved.

  • I didn’t think boundaries could be loving

    A stone terrace, with a short, moss covered rock wall along the edge of the terrace.

    Like many sensitive people, I have been exploring the concept of boundaries.  What does that word even mean, what do boundaries look like, when do I need them, is it okay to have them, when should I strengthen them, etc?

    I had this very innocent belief that if I had boundaries, then people would feel like I didn’t love them.  I thought that having no boundaries was the way to prevent anyone from thinking I was rejecting them.  I have been learning that these beliefs are part of my trauma narrative and were created as a way of helping me.

    I also recently realized that not having boundaries was a way I could keep myself safe.  Without boundaries, I could instantly tell if someone’s mood was changing and then I could jump in to try to manage the situation to (hopefully) stay safe. 

    By not having boundaries, I was able to energetically hold onto the people around me, so I could match their moods or be who they needed me to be so I wouldn’t get hurt. 

    It’s truly incredible to learn about how much of this was totally unconscious and was using up a lot of mental and energetic energy to maintain.  These are all very innoncent strategies that I developed to get the love and care I needed and to keep myself safe. 

    I am learning to really respect the parts of me that developed these strategies.  I’m 46, so I grew up at a time when feelings weren’t really talked about, they were more suppressed.  So having the opportunity through therapy and nervous system rehabilitation work to learn more about these strategies, why they were formed and what I can do differently is such a gift. 

    I realized how much progress I had made when I told my dog that she couldn’t come lie on the bed with me, even though I knew she really wanted to, and I didn’t feel guilty.  In fact, I realized how much I loved her and myself, and that having boundaries meant I could love her and respect myself more.  It was such a liberating but simple moment. 

    I’m looking forward to experimenting more with boundaries and building up my internal strength and resilience. I am very grateful for the trauma-informed therapy I am doing.  It makes me feel much safer to learn about myself and my history.  I am learning to be so compassionate to myself for how much I have survived and I am building an extensive library of tools to help me moving forward. 

    I am starting to be able to tell the difference between when I feel safe and grounded and when I am relating to my life from my trauma narrative.  I had no idea that there were two perspectives within me, I just knew that sometimes I felt powerful and capable, and other times I felt so small, victim-like and deeply sad. 

    It seems like the more I get to know that deeply safe, confident, powerful and strong part of me, then the easier it will be to have boundaries.  And the more I understand and recognize the very hurt parts of me and take care of them, then they’ll trust me to take the lead more. 

    I just love learning this stuff, it makes me feel so great.  There are so many people like me and there are so many tools and approaches I can take, including making sure I enjoy life and have fun, despite doing deep healing work and being chronically exhausted. 

    Maybe I can have it all, despite feeling limited?  That sounds really nice.  I can have boundaries and still be the loving and caring person I am.  Maybe I can be tired and still happy.  Maybe I can grieve the loss of my energy but be excited for all the opportunities I am gaining through this exhausted time in my life?  Ya, I like all of that.

    Thanks for reading and I wish you all the best in getting to know what your needs are and how you can best meet them.

    Take care, Bradlee 🩷🩷🌈🌈🌟🌟

  • Nothing wrong

    Sand on a beach with the word, peace, written in it.

    It’s hard to describe just how much I’ve blamed myself for being unwell with chronic fatigue syndrome.  And for how many years, I didn’t even believe I was sick, just that I was tired, and if I could just do the right things, then I wouldn’t be so tired. 

    I’ve been on disability leave from my work for over a year and I’m still exhausted most days.  And my leave was just extended for up to another year.  It was only in the last few weeks that I realized, hmmm, I think it’s okay for me to say that I’m sick, not just that I’m so so tired. 

    The more I learn about trauma, the more the way I have treated myself makes sense.  In a way, I’ve been gaslighting myself, not really understanding that I was doing it, or how harmful it really has been.  Or that I was repeating patterns of how I’ve been treated as an innocent and unconscious way of keeping myself safe.

    I’m navigating the dark depths of my life and what I’ve survived, and the more I navigate, the more I see, understand and relax.  And the more I understand that I haven’t done anything wrong.  I am sick.  I am unwell.  And that’s okay.  It’s even okay if I never get better.  But it’s also okay if I do.  None of this is my fault, or is as a result of something I should have done better or differently.  It just is.

    This morning, I was so tired and I just felt myself laugh and know that I couldn’t keep blaming myself or working so hard to find the one thing or combination of things that will heal me.  Instead, I embraced myself, how I feel, where I’m at and the exhaustion, took a bath, and am now going to do whatever most meets my needs throughout the day.  And that will be enough.  And it’s not wrong, in fact, it’s a gift.  To have the time and space to learn how to take care of my deepest needs so that I can rest, rejuvenate and heal.  And whether I get better or not, I know I’ll be okay, because I already am despite it all. 

    I can do this and I believe in myself.  I will likely need to reread these words and relearn this lesson a few times, and that’s okay.  I’m tired.  I’m unwell.  I need rest and healing.  I am not doing anything wrong and I’m doing okay, just as I am.  And I am okay. 

    May your heart guide you and may you see the good you are despite all you’ve already survived and endured. 

    With love and care, Bradlee

    ©️ Bradlee Zrudlo 2026.  All Rights Reserved.

  • Thinking of my emotions like they’re a “check engine” warning

    A photo of the instrument panel on a car dashboard

    Instead of getting all riled up by my feelings, like I was earlier today, I wondered if it would help me to think of them like a little “check engine” light.  Nothing personal, nothing to fix, get over, analyze or heal from, but an indicator that some care is needed.

    If you’ve been reading my posts lately, I have been writing about my changing relationship with my most complex and challenging emotions and feelings.  I am learning how to allow my feelings, how to stay present with them, and to feel them as opposed to focusing on the events from my past that they likely stemmed from.

    So, this metaphor came to me tonight.  What if resentment, for example, is like a “check engine” light or a “check oil” light.  One that reminds me that I need care (not a car service, tee hee).  And that likely I have been sacrificing myself or not meeting my needs.  That seems pretty simple.  I felt some serious resentment over the smallest thing this evening before I realized that the last few weeks have been challenging and I needed rest.  When I thought of it this way, I didn’t feel as angry and resentful, but instead, it was super easy to tell myself I had done more than enough today and that I should lie down and watch TV.  It made a big difference to my experience of those big feelings.  It gave me a bit of separation from them and made me feel mature, grounded and able to take care of myself. 

    This realization helped me acknowledge more deeply that I haven’t been feeling great all week, and that I have been doing an excellent job experimenting with how to care for myself during this stressful week.  It’s easy for me to feel like a victim, and choiceless, but in writing this post and reflecting, I see that through small actions and choices this week, I showed up for myself, even when I got super triggered, exhausted and overwhelmed.

    I am open to exploring those big emotions as a “check engine” light that is here to help me meet my needs in each moment.  Tonight, I need to get into bed early, read and go to sleep!

    Sweet dreams, 🌟♥️🌸, Bradlee

    ©️ Bradlee Zrudlo 2026.  All Rights Reserved.

  • Holding space instead of overcoming

    Note to readers: this post includes descriptions of my inner pain, trauma and learning how to allow all of me to be here.  Please read with care 💖.

    This morning I had a vision in my mind’s eye.  I saw a paper with my inner narrative written on it, the one I formed while growing up. 

    Words on a white piece of paper, such as scared, I am trying so hard, etc.

    I saw me trying to write over it to create more of what I wanted. 

    The same paper, with bigger words in red written over, like I am safe, I am loved.

    I saw the original words getting bigger, darker and they were working to ensure they could be seen and read.

    The same paper with big, black bold words, such as scared, I hate you.

    To help me further process this very impactful vision, I recreated it in the images above.  It was a very powerful experience to actually feel into the words and feelings for each stage above.  It allowed me to understand myself better and to have more compassion for myself.

    I have used a lot of willpower in my life to overcome my inner narrative and pain.  I have had to work so hard to keep this up and its been exhausting trying to overwrite and escape from something that is within me.  This morning I was lying in bed and reflecting that maybe the time had come to coexist with all aspects of me and my inner world. 

    This realization is really in keeping with what I am learning in my nervous system rehabilitation program – to build capacity to be with my most difficult emotions and experiences.  To witness them and allow them instead of trying to rewrite my story each day (which is so so exhausting).

    The more I learn about myself, and the more I decompress from a life of stress, not feeling safe and being in protection mode, the more empathy I have for myself.  My physical and mental health have been on the decline, and it all makes so much sense the more I learn and process.  How could I be thriving when so much of my life force energy is going into keeping me safe and worrying for the safety of my loved ones?  Learning about trauma and the nervous system has helped me understand how I can’t just keep trying to rewrite my life.  It’s so much more than just trying harder, having a positive attitude or using willpower. 

    And so, I will take a deep breath.  I will acknowledge that I have been trying to force my way into my ideal inner experience of life, without realizing that I have been fighting with myself to get there.  I breathe again.  And again.  And I feel the pain, vulnerability and hurt that I have inadvertently been pushing away because that’s how trauma works to keep me safe.  And I breathe again. 

    I open my palms, side by side, to hold all the words on the pages above.  I breathe deeply to have the courage to let them all exist, and occupy space within me.  And I breathe to allow myself to feel it all and learn from all of those feelings and experiences and move forward together.

    One step at a time, I am working towards my PhD in Being Me.  I wish you so much ease, clarity and insight in your own journey with becoming an expert in being yourself.

    With love and care, Bradlee

    A black painting with splashes of colors, with a light shining through the dark to illuminate a calm, meditative Bradlee
    An art piece from nearly a year ago, about finding myself.

    ©️ Bradlee Zrudlo 2026.  All Rights Reserved.

  • Getting older

    Photo of Bradlee's left hand
    My 46 year old hand

    I am different lately.  Turning 46 has been a big one for me.  I am no longer a young person, I am closer to 50 than to 40, and I can  tell that I view life differently than the youth I am around.  My skin looks more wrinkly, my face looks older, and my body seems a bit more fragile.

    I don’t think all is lost, but there is some grief for me during this time.  I don’t have a young child anymore, and I won’t be walking down the street holding a tiny hand any longer (not that I have in years).  I see young people who run down the street, so full of life and energy and I mourn the loss of my own youth and energy, although chronic fatigue syndrome plays a big role in that. 

    I look at my precious husband and hope we have so many more years of hand holding, laughing and enjoying each other’s company.  And I wonder how long we will live in our cute little house in the country.  I hope that our son will have his parents around for many, many more years to come.  I look forward to cheering for him as he navigates and explores his life and how best to live it.

    I am not lost in these feelings of grief and hope, rather they seem to flow in and out of my mind as I live my life.  I am not trying to get away from the thoughts because grief and I have become friends over the years, and I know that it is a part of being a human, just as much as joy and love.

    I have had such an amazing life up to now, despite all the hardships and things I could have done without, and the grief I feel honours this.  I couldn’t have asked for a better husband and son, or such a quiet life in the country.  I am so grateful for the innocence that I have within me, the grace and power too, and my big, huge belly laughs.  None of that is over, but so much else feels like it is after turning 46.  My internal suffering is easing slightly as I learn more what I need, and that is such a relief, but it may also be contributing to these feelings of grief.  Who might I be without all this pain, anxiety, loneliness, exhaustion and sadness that I have felt for so long?  I wonder 🌸🌟.

    Well, to the me who came before, the one who is healing, the one who has never needed healing, and the me who is living today and every future day, I say, well done.  You have made it.  No matter what the future holds, I am with you.  Every tear, every fear, every laugh, every wrinkle and every moment has brought me here, and I wouldn’t be me without it all.  Grief and joy, all together, for this opportunity to live this exact life, even though I have tried to resist it and get away from it.  I am here, learning to allow, to feel, to open my heart to it all.

    Big hugs, xoxo ❤️, Bradlee

    Red hearts of different sizes on a black background

    ©️ Bradlee Zrudlo 2026.  All Rights Reserved.