In my life, I have not been kind to my anger. I have denied it, suppressed it and turned it inwards instead of giving it a voice. I specifically remember times when I felt anger building within me and I told it and myself that I wanted to be nice and that my anger had no right to take over like that.
I have long known that I really harmed myself by taking that approach, and over the past several years, i have been learning how to feel anger, trust myself with anger, and to give it a voice.
I have written several blog posts and poems about anger, and have talked about my feelings of anger with others, but deep down, I still felt ashamed of my anger. I was giving myself permission to feel and experience it, but on one level, I was still not okay with anger.
Yesterday, I learned again that anger can be suppressed passion that needs to be expressed. I can give my anger room to breathe by expressing it creatively and artistically. Not by continuing to shove it down or judge it, but by capturing its full intensity through my writing, drawing, cooking, and whatever creative ways I can give it an uncensored voice. I acknowledge that throwing sticks or rocks while yelling is also very effective! I really enjoy doing that!
Learning about expressing my anger creatively gave me a deeper sense of peace. Feeling and expressing anger are a part of life, and I am learning it is safe for me to experience and express it. I can give myself full and complete permission to feel and express anger, even if sometimes I’d rather feel differently.
Thank you precious anger.
Thank you for coming to the surface of my being and refusing to stay banished within me.
Thank you for erupting from my depths to teach me about my worthiness, the importance of boundaries and needing space, and to trust instead of punish myself.
Thank you for giving me permission to be all of myself and for shedding guilt and shame about being a fully feeling human.
Thank you for energizing and galvanizing me during times of injustice. I love feeling the surge of anger that precedes me taking action to right a wrong, it is truly magnificent.
Thank you dearest body, mind, heart and soul for giving me the space and time to deny my anger, even though I was denying myself.
Thank you for reading this post.
Thank you, I am smiling. May we all be blessed with liberation from suffering, and the freedom to feel, trust and safely exptess our emotions.
© Bradlee Zrudlo 2023. All Rights Reserved.
PhD in Being Me 