The older I have gotten (I am 44), the more I am giving myself permission to pause. A pause can mean many things, including:
- Taking a breath before I respond to a person or a situation
- Deciding that I will get back to a person instead of answering them right away
- Prioritizing taking care of myself, even if just for a short while, before working through the items on my to do list.
Am I an expert at pausing? Sometimes, and sometimes I rush and feel so much pressure that a pause is the last thing I think about.
Learning about me from my experiences is the point of working towards a PhD in Being Me. I am at the school of me, learning every day about how best to take care of myself and honour myself as I live my life. And to do this with as much kindness, grace, care and love I can possibly give myself, including giving myself a big or little pause when I need it.
I have had a very narrow window of tolerance for the last several months as I was very stressed out by my life’s circumstances. I have included a pdf for those new to the window of tolerance concept or how trauma can influence your window of tolerance (I hope it works!)
As I take better care of myself, my window of tolerance is increasing. With that increase, it is getting easier to notice when a pause would benefit me.
For example, I was annoyed by my dog’s behavior the other day, and I realized that I had other choices than getting really angry or crying. Just that realization alone was the pause I needed to access more choices within me. It was like I saw the overwhelmed and tired parts of myself and honoured them with that pause that allowed me to choose how to respond better.
Being off work has allowed me to see how much I was just holding on and coping every day, instead of living and thriving. I know many of us can relate to those words. If you can, I send you many big hugs, it sure is tough. No matter where you are in your life, whether you are thriving or just holding on, may there be many more golden pauses available to you, and lots of love, kindness and peace too.
With lots of care 💕, Bradlee
© Bradlee Zrudlo 2024. All Rights Reserved
PhD in Being Me 