Delicate

Feeling like I am on thin ice Unsure which move I can safely make Will the decision I make leave me drained, emotionally and physically Or will it fill up my heart’s cup enough to offset the fatigue that will surely come? This delicate balancing act of trying to conserve my limited energy while stillContinue reading “Delicate”

The potato turning point

I have a beautiful life.  I have the best family, a safe and cozy home, wonderful friends, and many other incredible blessings. At the same time, I am exhausted. I am also mentally exhausted from having chronic fatigue syndrome for several years and from trying to make it all work with such limited energy. IContinue reading “The potato turning point”

What If?

What if? I asked myself that question this morning.  What if it’s okay to struggle?  What if it’s okay to have chronic fatigue syndrome that can be deeply debilitating?  What if it’s okay that I have been having a hard time these last several years? After all, what am I other than a human being,Continue reading “What If?”

Inspiration

I find it important lately to find inspiration from all possible sources.  I have been worn down by circumstances in my life, and I have felt how dysregulated my nervous system is and how truly exhausted I have been in all aspects of my being. I have taken several months off work to take betterContinue reading “Inspiration”

Done

Sometimes I am done. I have nothing more to give, no more capacity to think things through, or to deal with differing opinions constructively or compassionately. When I am in this place, I rest. When cookies are finished baking, there is no point in keeping them in the oven because they’ll just burn. With people,Continue reading “Done”

Cultivating strength through weakness and hardship

Sneak peek: loving video at the end of this post! Since I started getting progressively more tired with chronic fatigue syndrome, I thought I was getting weaker.  It can be easy to associate any condition or change in abilities with weakness.  I felt the same about how anxious I was getting over the years.  ItContinue reading “Cultivating strength through weakness and hardship”

To Be Human

To be human. What is it really? Is it to be perfect, to have everything organized and controlled? Or it is about acknowledging that life gets messy and choosing gratitude anyway? Is it about having everything society tells me I should have? Or is it about making the best with what I’ve got and dreamingContinue reading “To Be Human”

How a total lunar eclipse helped me

I have chronic fatigue syndrome and anxiety, but I also have a huge heart, a cute innocence about the way I interact with the world, a love of swearing, a tall, strong body and an awakening consciousness that sometimes truly humbles and astounds me. That was a long sentence, but it was needed to showContinue reading “How a total lunar eclipse helped me”

Notes to myself at 4am

Do you ever wake up in the early morning hours and feel like you need to spend time with yourself? That happens to me every now and then. I usually don’t mind it because I feel like it’s the universe giving me a little nudge to discover what my heart, mind and body want toContinue reading “Notes to myself at 4am”

How a drag show gave me the boost I needed

On Saturday, I had the absolute pleasure to attend a drag show in Kemptville that was put on by North Grenville Pride. I almost didn’t go…I was so tired last week and I was feeling much more anxious than usual. I had pretty much already decided not to go, but then a whisper within meContinue reading “How a drag show gave me the boost I needed”